There were a lot of factors that went into my decision to retire – the first, and probably most important at the time was the sudden realization that my parents were getting older. My dad had just turned 83 and my mom would turn 80 in August. If I wanted to have any quality time with them, I needed to do it now. My mom was serving as my dad’s primary caretaker because he has mobility issues, but her mind wasn’t as sharp as it once was, short-term memory, especially. In addition, the drive to Maryville, as beautiful as it is, just didn’t make getting up at 5:30am in the dead of winter more desirable since it was dark when I left and getting dark when I headed home. Truth is, I’ve always been a tiny bit jealous of my husband’s flexible schedule. He was available to help out our daughter with their four kids when needed, but that was MY job, right? She and her husband recently had their fourth child, a little girl! Being a grandmother is important to me. I want my grandchildren to know me and feel comfortable at our house. I’d recently found myself getting impatient with them, not because they had done anything wrong, but because I was simply exhausted from being with over 100 adolescents all day. These reasons were the main ones for my decision, but I’d be misleading anyone who reads this blog if I didn’t confess to the toll being “positive” in all circumstances and “on call” 24-7 took on me. Answering parent emails about assignments, pulling together make-up work for family vacations, dealing with cheating, worrying about students who don’t do their work, etc. was draining my passion for teaching. So much about it, wasn’t about teaching anymore…even in Maryville.
Once I made my decision, I talked to my husband about it, and he agreed. Financially, it probably wasn’t a smart move, but I had no regrets. A tremendous burden was lifted from my shoulders, and I had peace about it. I didn’t tell anyone for several weeks, and once I did, it wasn’t as hard as I had anticipated. Yes, tears were shed, but I knew I made the right decision. Fortunately, it was late April when I told the folks at my school, but by then, my family had a tremendous challenge ahead.
My mom had been sick with a UTI, and her medicine didn’t seem to be working. It wasn’t like her to get her feet knocked out from under her – she walked three miles around the neighborhood every day. She LOVED “her hills” and being outside. It was her respite from the demands of my dad. We took her back to see the doctor, and received the news that she had Stage 4 perineum cancer (colon cancer), and she made the decision not to fight the disease. And so began the toughest chapter of my life so far.
My dad, sisters and I pulled together to see her through to the end, surrounded by love and prayer, and as pain-free as possible. Sadly, but mercifully, my mom did not suffer long. Mothers’ Day 2024 was a very special day as Addie and Carter were in town, and Mom had a chance to feel good and look good one more time. She died on May 26 at about noon, right after church. Her funeral was held on May 29.
As difficult and demanding as this season was, my school family had my back and allowed me to spend as much time as possible with my mom – even giving me a day off from school during the last week. God had a plan for me. He knew the emotions of walking through the halls of Montgomery Ridge on the last day would be too much for me. I had time to pack up my classroom and leave without too much fanfare. The greatest lesson I learned through this time was to trust God. He knows what we don’t, and He has our best interest in mind.